Food Wars: Mom Freak Out + Movies

Almost as fast as hit publish on my breastfeeding post, I had an crazy mom moment and freaked out about Behr's feeding routine.

I wrote this frantic email:

Ladies,

I don't know where to go with Behr's food and I have reached a point where I can't get a straight answer about what is next. I feel like I have created this black hole by being particular. Any advice/wisdom would be greatly appreciated.

I am having trouble pumping these days. I can sit for 45 minutes and get less than 2 ounces. Behr begins daycare at my work in 3 weeks, so I can breast feed him again during the day, but my freezer supply is gone and I can't make enough bottles for the next day. He is taking two 6 ounce bottles while I am gone. But when I am home he still eats every three hours, perhaps because I am not producing enough?

He will be 7 months on Friday. Do I start formula? If so what kind? I feel like formula is evil. Am I crazy? Can I introduce milk? Goats milk perhaps? If so, when?

Food: We started introducing it at 6 months and are trying omitting grains for the first year. Behr loves all of the food we have introduced. Info from our doctor was conflicting about when to introduce meat. What have you done? We are "making" our own food but largely skipping purees - trying to give him food as close to table consistency as possible. This includes: Mashed foods: (bananas, avocadoes, beets, sweet potato, carrots, green beans, plums) and sliced foods that he sucks/gnaws on (pear, cantaloupe, cucumber). What do I add next? Can I give Behr applesauce that isn't specifically made for baby? How did you introduce meat and when?

I am totally stressing out, and I am not quite sure why. I have been reading books and trying to find info on line, but nothing is very clear. I wish there was a step by step guide to follow. I like following rules.

Thanks in advance for your help.
Shannon

Bonus, Behr doesn't seem to be bothered one bit by my frantic obsession over the ba-jillion choices you have to make when feeding a baby.  He just loves eating:

I received a tremendous amount of helpful feedback.  Thank you dear friends!  After implementing many of the suggestions, I realized that you all might also freak out like me, or just maybe I can share some info before you reach that point.

pumping vs. formula vs. milk answers:

1. Milk, even goats milk needs to wait.  Most advice says 12 months, but dear Casey is among the many mommas who have assured me that 11 months is a-okay.  I will let you know when we get there!

2. Remember when Behr was born and Julie wrote a don't judge post?  Well, that is where I need to be in the formula camp.  I promise you, I am trying my best to produce milk for Behr, but sometimes he needs formula.  Right now we are using Wegman's Organic Formula, thanks to Julie's recommendations, and once again assurance that feeding Behr formal will not ruin him.  After all, I got fed formula at three weeks old, and look at how great I am!  just kidding  Seriously, though, huge thanks to Julie, Faith, Rebecca, and Liz for talking me off the edge of a cliff.


3. Check your pump parts! Duh. Mine were in good working order, but it never occurred to me.  Kate is pretty smart.

4. Kate also told me to pump in the morning.  This has been my lifesaver.  I pump every morning, and easily get 2-3 times as much as if I pumped at night.  Genius!

5. Friends also recommended hospital grade pumps.  If Behr hadn't moved into daycare in my building, where I can nurse throughout the day, it would have become a serious option.  I am convinced it is worth the cost for working moms.


For more on formula and little eaters in general, read what Lauren has to say here.  It is good stuff.

This post is getting "birth-story long" so I will stop and share food advice next week.  But here is one more video of Behr, for good measure.

there was water everywhere.

are you surprised?

How breastfeeding works for us.

We have made it! Nearly 7 months of breastfeeding, so we have reached the ubiquitous milestone of breastfeeding for the first 6 months. Behr was exclusively* breastfed for this time with two very minor exceptions, but I will go into those later. I am now facing the reality that working 30+ hours out of the home, pumping at least three times a day, and not having my baby so close, leaves me worried that my supply is waning and I won't make it until his first birthday let alone the recommended two years.

My worries aside, I have learned more than I ever could have imagined. They {although I don't quite remember who} say that a crazy high percentage of learning takes place from conception to age 5. Well over half of your learning. Since having Behr, I would now argue that for women, the next greatest time of learning in life is immediately after conceiving. Call it mother's instinct or my own obsessive compulsive nature, and perhaps heightened availability of information these days, but I have consumed more information on all sides of every issue in the past year and a half than I ever thought possible.

There is a lot of crap information. Many people address parenting issues with scare tactics. And the topic of breastfeeding, while coming back into vogue, is at the top of the list for heated debates. So I do not enter into this topic lightly, but with the caveat that every parent child relationship is different. As a mother, you need to fight for what is best for you and your baby. With that said, here is what worked for us, and a few pointers along the way.

If you want to venture into breastfeeding your baby, know that it takes serious dedication and support. Talk to your loved ones now and make sure that they will provide the encouragement you will no doubt need along the way. It was important for Mark to understand why this was so important to me. He was charged with the responsibility of getting Behr and I "together" for our first feeding as soon as possible.

Don't let the thought of a c-section or a possible nicu stay frighten you regarding breastfeeding. Behr and I did not have our first latch for nearly two hours after he was born. It is okay. He was in me for over 41 weeks, so we were still able to bond. I was terrified that all hope of breastfeeding would be ruined as they wheeled me down the hall after 50 hours of labor into a sterile operating room. I wish someone had assured me that the worry was not necessary.

Do you have a strong let-down? I was so engorged when my milk came in that I could not lower my arms. My dear friend Karlene and I still laugh today because I would lean forward and immediately leak through my nursing pads, padded bra, tee shirt, and sometimes even sweatshirt. Milk oozed out of me from seemingly every crevice. Then I found this wonderful invention: Milkies. If you have a healthy production, check them out. This allowed me to nurse from one side each feeding, to ensure Behr got both the fore milk and the hind milk, without leaking through everything. It also gave me the bonus of capturing the precious leaking milk for my freezer supply.

Beginning to pump in the first few weeks also helped me become more comfortable. There is a balance between pumping to relieve your engorged boobs and having pumping over stimulate, leading to more discomfort. Start slowly and figure out what works for you. If you need help producing, pump mid-way between feedings to trigger your body to produce more milk.

If you are currently pregnant, buy nursing pads now. To see my favorites, check out my Gear Guide for Nursing. I began leaking at 20 weeks. The med students at the hospital were amazed as I let down during my epidural. So fingers crossed you won’t have to deal with it as much as I did. But it is never too early to be ready.

I was not a fan of giving Behr anything other than me for meal time, but I realized that a nipple shield was worth it to allow him to eat successfully. Due to the pressure, I was basically water boarding Behr during each feeding in those early weeks. He was drinking out of a fire hose, and as a result, not getting much milk down to his belly. Once he was strong enough, he transitioned off the nipple shield just fine.

Are you going back to work? Think about your nursing goals as you look for child care. I knew I would be leaving Behr with a nanny at home for the first bit until we got into day care. So I investing in a double electric pump and began stocking my freezer early. Having a supply of milk reduced the stress on me to pump enough each day for the very next day. I knew he would not go hungry. Another factor was in choosing our daycare, the opportunity for me to visit and nurse Behr during my work day, made the day care located on sight even more appealing. Update: We get in starting September 1, easing my production worries! We are so excited!

While some mothers find breastfeeding an incredibly bonding time. It is OKAY if you don’t have the same overwhelming emotions of joy. I am a generally impatient person, so Behr’s 45 minute feeding sessions drove me mad. I began picking a good TV show or answering email on my blackberry to keep myself from cutting him short. Do we enjoy the bond? Sometimes yes, but other times for me it feels like a sacrifice I am willing to make because I believe strongly in the health benefits.

Make nighttime feeding easier. I quickly learned the side lying position which meant I could doze a bit while Behr fed. This was a life saver in the middle of the night.

Eat fruit and drink lots of water. Breastfeeding makes me dehydrated and often leaves me feeling lightheaded or dizzy. Having a natural sugar from fruit and plenty of water helps. When I pump at work, I often chow on a granola bar as I walk back to my office. Just be sure to listen to your body.

Boost your production. I drink more water than ever before, take fenugreek and drink Mother’s Milk tea or Women's Raspberry Leaf tea. It is hard to tell if any of these things specifically boost my milk production, but I feel like they are working, so I stick with it.

Find a schedule that works for you. Will you have parent directed feedings, or will your baby decide his or her own nursing schedule. Do what works for you. For us, Behr fed on demand, which was a pretty consistent 3-4 hour cycle. But when I was home on maternity leave, I felt it was important to allow him to eat more often when he needed to. Eventually, this led to me reducing the crying fits and becoming better attuned to his growth spurts. We follow the “EASY” method – Eat, Activity, Sleep, Yourself. Behr eats when he wakes up from naps rather than as he goes down for a nap. This works for us. Find what works for you.

Continuing to breastfeed while I work has been a bit of a challenge. I pump twice a day at work and then once at home between 11pm and midnight based on when Behr last ate. He sleeps from 7/8-2/3 now, so I can stay up and pump to make sure I have enough for his two 6ounce bottles the next day. Somewhere around the beginning of month 5 I realized I wasn’t pumping enough and my freezer stock of over 100 ounces was severely depleted. This schedule means I don’t get much sleep. And I think the lack of sleep might be leading to why I am not getting a good pumping session in at night. It is a vicious cycle.

A bit about exclusively breastfeeding. Going strong for six months was a goal of mine. We did introduce small sips of water because it has been a boiling hot summer and Behr sweats…like a grown man. I was worried about his hydration, so when we are out and about he gets a bit of water between feedings. We also introduced a few ounces of prune juice during times when he goes over five days without a BM. This kid does not like to poop. His record is 9 days! Both of these were after the 4.5 month mark. But we did not introduce any solid food until 6 months. So that is why I say we exclusively breastfed, although I know some die hards would object to this claim.

Do you still have questions? I feel like I haven’t even come close to doing this topic justice. Feel free to leave a comment or drop me an email and I would be happy to share more of what has worked for us. 
Huge thanks for all of the email questions I got about nursing from friends and bloggers. You have helped me formulate the material for this post, and I likely would have found it too daunting a subject without my hundreds of emails with all of you. You ladies are amazing!


all pictures from pinterest search: "breastfeeding"

because I really didn't feel it necessary to put my own boobs on the internet.



Gear for Baby: Nursing

Great nursing bra:  After trying what felt like hundreds, my favorite came from A Pea in the Pod.   Although it was a splurge, but literally the only way I made it out of the house.

Sturdy bottle brush: This tool gets a lot of use in our household, and the Skip Hop Bottle Brush stands up to the challenge

Basic burp cloths: Hands down the most used gift we received was a 12 pack of Gerber prefolds.  These absorb everything, and are nothing fancy, so you don't mind the inevitable baby stains.  Let's face it, breastfeeding is messy business in the beginning.  I recommend having at least one of these near by at all times.

Washable nursing pads: Again, I tried many different kinds, but these were my favorite.

Disposable nursing pads: A worthy investment for the leaky days, as they are much more discrete for leaving the house.  The most absorbent brand I found were Lansinoh.

Basic bra: The classic Gap racerback bra was my go-to for the evenings.  They wash well, are relatively affordable, and useful both before and after baby.  Best of all, they are easy to yank up or down for nighttime feedings.

Bottles: My advice is figure out what works and stick with one brand.  No need to worry about interchangeable parts, finding the right pieces, etc. We chose the Dr. Brown wide neck as they are said to reduce nipple confusion when you need to introduce a bottle early.  I went back to work after three months, so we introduced one bottle a day early to ease the transition.

Electric double pump (not pictured): Because I was going back to work - translation: needing to pump 3-4x/day - we knew we needed a power horse.  I opted for the Medela Pump In Style and couldn't be happier.

Nursing cover: Behr and I both struggled with nursing covers until we tried a basic swaddle blanket.  The fabric is lightweight and breathable so he didn't get overheated and it was plenty big enough to keep us modest.

Milk saver: If you are blessed with an abundance of milk, this little accessory will be your friend.  It cleverly collects leaking/letdown from one side while you nurse on the other.  I highly recommend the milk saver.

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Do you have any questions?  I would love to answer them.  

Quite a few friends have been asking me about nursing recently, so I am working on a post to cover more of the unknowns about this rite of passage that so many women struggle through {myself included}.  

Drop me a line so I can be sure to include your questions!